Comments on: Dear Flann: Readers’ mailbag

By: Flann O'Coonassa

Flann O'Coonassa — Thu, 17 Dec 2009 20:42:04 +0000

Kittens make passable slippers Manuel, but I find they lack a snugness you only achieve with slippers made from Panda cubs.

By: Manuel Estimulo

Manuel Estimulo — Thu, 17 Dec 2009 17:08:08 +0000

Hola Flan!

You are know full well I was drying them out to make slippers!

Besos

Manuel

By: Flann O'Coonassa

Flann O'Coonassa — Thu, 17 Dec 2009 11:53:28 +0000

Your kittens Manuel? Your kittens? You’ve got some nerve. Those kittens were in an awful state when I found them. It took me 6 weeks to nurse them back to health, and they still tasted chewy after being broiled.

By: Manuel Estimulo

Manuel Estimulo — Thu, 17 Dec 2009 11:48:49 +0000

Hola Flan!

Where are my kittens?

Besos

Manuel

By: Flann O'Coonassa

Flann O'Coonassa — Thu, 17 Dec 2009 08:59:53 +0000

You’re close to the truth Peterson. The IBPPOF was little more than a pyramid scheme that preyed upon the penis-broken, exploiting their emotional vulnerability and delicate scrotal districts. Promises of research into titanium penis reconstruction were not honoured after initial investments.

By: Flann O'Coonassa

Flann O'Coonassa — Thu, 17 Dec 2009 08:57:11 +0000

As numerous movie nemesis’ have said to each other Old Knudsen, ‘there can be only one’. That’s why I stepped aside to allow you take top mantel.

I’d had my time. I believe I peaked (figuratively and otherwise) on ‘A Few Good Semen’. I wanted to out at the top, and couldn’t bare the thought of taking minor rolls in poor productions as I got older.

For example, I played the part of a pool cleaner in one of my last features. That was it. No funny business. I literally arrived, cleaned the pool and left. The sleaze wasn’t even occurring at that house.

By: Peterson

Peterson — Thu, 17 Dec 2009 04:35:24 +0000

Flann, was this the reason you founded (and subsequently pillaged) the International Broken Penis and Puma Owners Foundation (IBPPOF)? Which, incidentally, broke the 5 million membership mark last July. Or was it, as many* have speculated, just an avante garde money laundering scam designed to profit your other great passion: the Avant Garde Money Laundering Scammers Union (AGMLSU)?

*”Many” referring to everyone involved with both foundations, all your family and friends, and everyone you have ever met.

By: Old Knudsen

Old Knudsen — Thu, 17 Dec 2009 03:55:05 +0000

If you hadn’t left the adult movie industry then my career wouldn’t have taken of. I mean two people in the world who can do the old ‘catch yer own jizz rainbow kiss routine’ isn’t as special as just one. Maggie said she was going to look you up so i’d go into hiding as that thing still hasn’t cleared up yet……… oh and yer sis is hot.